Feel like you are not getting any where despite how hard you try?

Feel like you are on your own, and no one listens or cares?

If either of the above is true, then lean in, come in closer, because this page, this page right here, is just for you.

Some times in life we can lose our way. There is no shame nor judgement in that and it can take the smallest of things , not just the big things to knock us off track, so how do we get back on?

is the path you are on the right one for you?

This seems rather a personal question but what it does, is gets you to think about what that means, and how this can help you.

Who are you living for? Who are you pleasing or trying to please?

Some times we live our life trying to please others and that is amazing, it is honorable but is it YOU, and do we achieve in pleasing them and does it make you happy?

If you are happy then feel free to not read further, but if you are thinking and have more questions then please stay with me.

WE ALL HAVE OUR BREAKDOWNS AND CRY MOMENTS.

You are not on your own if you do. It is human, it is natural and it is your bodys’ self defence mechanism trying to cope with what is going on.

Our minds, our hearts can only take so much! They need space to process, to think through to strategise what is next, and how to move on.

For those of who have heard of or study “Mbraining or Multiple Brain Integration Techniques MBIT for short ) we recognise that we have multiple brains that are capable of thinking.

The most common of these are the heart, the brain and the gut, although there are more.

So to give an example…..(just an example)

You might be feeling upset – heart

You need cheering up to find balance again – Mind

Gut – chocolate is the answer

Of course there may be deeper work that may need to happen but in that moment as a short fix as a band aid/plaster

“yes, chocolate gives off chemicals that makes us feel happy” – the brain – I agree to that solution.

“yes, chocolate is my comfort food and I do feel happier and I want to feel happier” – heart

“yes let’s do it” – gut

So in this scenario we say that they are all in agreement and we call this alignment.

How does this apply to my problem

Great question!

What you are going through right now, may need a quick temporary fix to get you through but may also need some deeper work.. for example if I have a puncture, I may get a puncture repair kit which will work for so long but at some point I may need to replace the tyre.

Do you want a quick fix or do you want more extensive work?

Sometimes we get lost, stuck lose our purpose, do not have a purpose, lose our identity or lose perspective, and we need help restoring those things. Sometimes when we live for others or please others we lose ourselves.

some simple top tips

  • Acknowledge the moment – look back at where you have come from to where you are now. Ask yourself : Have you grown mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually.
  • Assess – what is not working right now, do you need help, do you have the knowledge, experience, skills to move forward, if not who has?
  • Ask and receive help – maybe you have helped others and now you need to allow others to help you . This is not a time for pride, independence or ego, this is not that time.
  • re allign.. – perhaps you came off course. Time to re adjust or head on a new setting or new journey.

If this has helped or resonates, please like share comment, or if you want help, please do get in touch to see if I can help further.

Thank you for reading .

Steven Alexander

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What is at your core?

Welcome, I’m Steve Alexander,

photo of steve sitting near a window holding a cup of coffee peering out. thinking about core feelings and emotions
core of life

What is at your core? Are you looking for change in your life. Same patterns? Same old? feeling broken? and need fixing or just need someone to listen?

I have been exploring values a lot these last few weeks especially core values. I have been discovering, re-discovering my own. The intention is that I can lead a better life, but also to help others.

Many talk about wanting to live a better life, lead a better life have more control, direction.

Folk I talk to, share, they feel like, they have no purpose, no direction. There is a feel in their inner core of “lost”.

The search for answers.

I hear what people say and can resonate, but the true answers come not from me, but from within themselves.

My job, is to listen, and listen more. In that place of listening, I can hear more than just peoples words. I can hear heartbeat, life rhythm, soul talking, body talking and they tell me more than they are aware.

When we are still and quiet, we can hear ourselves. The problem so many of us have, is that our life is so chaotic and full of demands.

Many of us will put others first. Time to ourselves is a luxury. Many of us, want to switch off from life, escape ( however we do that)

Then we do the same again and again. “Same old…different day.”

Anchors and strong holds

It is through connecting and talking I can pick up on anchors that are weighing people down. I hear those core messages in their life which hold them back.

In life, we often hold on to these messages. Even though we think they are hidden, they can seriously affect our heart soul and mind like strong holds.

Some do not realise these messages lie like vultures eating away at us and feeding on rotten scraps.

Messages may come in the form of “feeling not good enough” “not worthy” “worth less” “unlovable” “stupid.”

A whole host of many more that you yourself could list.

What comes out of people, is due to these core deep roots. Some people hurt others because they are hurt, and others love because they know what it is to be hurt.

The good news is that you do not have to defined by these, nor do you have to carry these wounds and baggage. how good would it feel to be free of these?

Patterns of behavior

It can be so easy to repeat patterns in life because they are what we know, or the way we have always done them or we know no other way.

That does not mean to say that has to continue!

In school, or when we grew up, we had to learn things in a certain way. Some found this controlling in some ways giving little room for freedom of thought and expression.

As people get older, they get presented with options. Many do not get those options, and a certain way of life is forced upon them.

In society, many will continue a way of life just “because that is the way it is.”

It is possible that they do not have any reason to change and so they do not. I notice, that those who want to change often do not have the support around them and struggle.

change

Do you struggle with change?

It is easy to moan that we want change to happen yet expect it to work like magic. Truthfully something needs to happen in order to make that change happen.

What is it that makes change so difficult? – perhaps it is not knowing what the future may be, perhaps it fear?

If there was a leak in the house or the car broke we would get them fixed.

When it comes to our own mental health and well being, many of us are reluctant to get help!

A lesson from X men

A quote I heard in an x men film was a conversation between professor xsavior and a young Jean Grey.

“You do not need fixing because you are not broken”

Sometimes it feels like we are , when the reality is, we are hurting.

If you need to talk about anything I have covered today in this post, please do get in touch. Let me know your thoughts, experiences, your story.

Thank you for reading.

Please feel free to like share comment or get in touch.

Steven Alexander.

Read more of my blogs

About me – the real inside scoop and first blog

Planning and stress reduction.

10 ways to deal with your fears

Your body – Your business

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